Nobody is perfect. Yet so often we compare our inner being with the public face of other people. If we are attached to our shortcomings – rather than our strengths – it can be difficult to be happy. When we learn to accept ourselves, warts and all, and to accurately describe ourselves, then when things go wrong, our enjoyment of life – as well as our resilience and well-being – is enhanced. This also helps us to accept others as they are.
The constant criticism in our minds about not being good enough is a sure way to be unhappy. This does not mean that we ignore our weaker areas or bad things that happen, but it means accepting that no one is perfect, and we are part of it. It means putting our imperfections (and things that happen to us) in perspective – to see them as normal and not extraordinary. And it means a shift of focus, from what we cannot have or do, to what we have or can do.
Happiness also comes in different types: the happiness you feel after sharing, after reaching a goal, and from doing fulfilling things. We also feel happy with the bonding we get from sharing kindness with others. According to Dr. Joe Dispenza, in The Reason Why Kindness Makes Us Happy, “One act of kindness is like dropping a pebble in a pond – the ripple spreads out to everyone and everything around you.”
Over the years, traveling around the world, fulfilling my goals in life, whether business or personal, I have realized that happiness isn’t actually found in someone, somewhere or something. It is merely found within you. You simply have to acknowledge its existence. No matter what people think of you, say about you, or even do to you, no one can bring you down because you know happiness exists in you. This is so simply because you are not what they define you as; you are who you think you are. It then follows, if you think you are happy, you are definitely happy.